I did the dishes

I did the dishes this morning.  This is no small thing.  I haven’t really done them for 7 months…  P and S and mom did them.  But S is in San Diego.  And my apartment is quiet and empty.  And the 48 hours of dishes were slowly building up.  And I took 10 minutes before I left today, and did them.

I started a mediatation class this monday.  Its Yogic.  Which is a little weird for me, b/c it involves God talk.  I just think of it all as a metaphor.  But there were some really good things that the really cute young monk talked about.  One of them was the idea that you are always either reinforcing or correcting behavior.  Every decisions reinforces that behaviour.

The monk used the example of cupcakes from Billy’s Bakery.  He obviously loves them.  If you walk by and smell the wonders of the cupcakes, and have one, the next time, you will want one.  You will be habituated to them.  If you go in then, you will almost expect to do this again and again. You get the ball rolling, and it rolls on its own inertia.

Conversely, it is hard to bring yourself to meditate at first.  It seems painful, and hard.  But the second time it is easier.  And the third even easier, and before you know it, it is just part of the routine.  You get the ball rollling and it rolls on its own inertia. Or at least that is the idea.

So washing the dishes is a big first step in getting the ball rolling.  Tomorrow it will be easier to do the dishes, and by next week, it will be no big deal.  Returning to the New Normal is hard.

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I am 30 year old Brooklynite who was diagnosed with Stage III Melanoma in February 2008. I started this blog after the first day of high dose Interferon chemotherapy in June 2008.

One thought on “I did the dishes”

  1. the billy’s thing is sort of weird– first i didnt know monk’s ate cupcakes but secondly, I discovered that to be true. I used to stop almost every day- then one day I didn’t and the next day i didn’t and now I walk by and the smell is simply enough (well, most of the time). . . 🙂

    now if only I could apply the same idea to pizza and late night snack attacks to the burger place down the street at 2am

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